Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Southern Fightin' Style

It's a well known fact that in America Southerners are the toughest, meanest fighting sumbitches around. Even the scrawniest Southerner can, and will, lay a whoopin' on the biggest yankee (northern or western) any time of the day. Don't believe me? Here's some proof, son:

Georgia Man Dies After Armless Man Headbutts Him During Fight


How 'bout that! Ha! That. Shit. Just. Happened.

Where else would that crap happen? I bet the armless dude wasn't wearing a shirt either.

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

A Little Reflection

Please excuse the random tone of this rant . . .

In light of the 'accomplishment' of Barry Bonds' 'surpassing' Henry Aaron's career homerun mark, let's remember some of the game's true heroes. There are many in the game's history who have not put up the numbers the numbers that Barry Bonds has, but who have contributed to the game in ways that Bonds never will; men such as Ozzie Smith, Andre Dawson, and Dale Murphy. How about men who put up big numbers such as Tony Gwynn, Henry Aaron, Ted Williams, and Cal Ripken, Jr.? Tyrus Raymond Cobb, Lou Gherig?

To be fair, baseball has had its share of players who were of questionable character. Hell, even those who argue that Ty Cobb was can't argue that he played the game (even with a stab wound) with passion and gave his team (and the game) everything that he had. Can we say the same about Bonds?

While the baseball writers hail Barry Bonds as the 'home run king,' I believe that true fans of the game will never recognize him as such. Our one consolation is that it looks like he will never win a championship.

Go to hell Barry. You're a disgrace to the game.

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

A Great Day In History

Today is the anniversary of D-Day but it is also the birthday of my best friend Joe. So, even though no one reads this crapblog, I want to wish my buddy a happy birthday. He's an awesome friend and anyone who says any different will get their eye gouged out with a plastic fucking spoon(or whatever is close to me at the time). Happy birthday Joe. Two great days in history.

Thursday, May 24, 2007

I Hope None of That Got On His Car

Dear criminals of America,

As you are out and about rhymin' and stealin', robbing, car-jacking, etc., etc., there are some things you should remember:

1-You should not rob people. It's just wrong.
2-You should not attempt to steal anyone's car. Ever. (Especially after they just washed it)
3-You should not try to rob an armed man with an unloaded weapon. Or a baseball bat.
4-Criminals are bad shots, but concealed carry permit holders are not. (Because we practice)
5-Getting shot not only hurts but once you have been shot you may die.

That is all the free advice for today. Eat it whores.

What is this Karma you speak of?

This is the story of a man. A very stupid man. A jackass piece of shit man. A dead man. This fooohl tried to kill his woman by parking his vehicle on the train tracks and getting out of the vehicle while leaving the woman inside. Seems like a solid theory since trains tend to win the car versus train fight. Karma can be a bitch sometimes though as this jackass found out when the train pushed the vehicle into the moron and killed him while the woman survived. Yes! Eat it whores.

Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Enjoy The Wheelchair, Jackass

Awesome story of some dumbshit vandal that was tipping over headstones in a cemetary when he got what he deserves: TWO BROKEN LEGS! Yes!! I love dumb criminal stories that end in a painfull lesson for some moron. Eat it whores.

Number Two with A Bullet

I always tell people, who have never read Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand, about the Library of Congress poll that listed the Holy Bible as the only book to be considered more influential than Rand's celebrated masterpiece. Here is a nice article about the book now in it's 50th year. Enjoy whores. AND READ THE FUCKING BOOK!

Another One Bites The Dust.....

The state of Tennessee executed a convicted cop killer early this morning. Yay! After 25 YEARS in prison and numerous appeals including the old standby "it's not humane" ( a bullshit arguement if there ever was one) they finally killed the sumbitch. About time. Who's next?

Monday, May 07, 2007

Sometimes Life Throws You Lemons

For the few of you who may possibly care, have compassion, or get a laugh at my expense, let me give you a brief rundown of the past 1 1/2 weeks of my life.

1. I become covered in poison ivy
2. I get really sick
3. My house gets burglarized
4. I lose my scholarship for some bureaucratic reason

So is this where I tell you that I am going to make lemonade? Well, the first two reasons, no. Not much I can do about that. #4? I can appeal, perhaps call my state representative, or perhaps pay my tuition out of pocket. Hey, only two more semesters and I'm finished anyway. But #3? Possibly.

I have good reason to suspect that the person (s) who burglarized my house was (were) associated either directly or indirectly to my cockroach-low rent-ghetto rat neighbors. The kind of neighbors who really give the neighborhood a real face lift when they move in. I guess the reason that I am writing this is so that I don't do what I feel like doing. Look, I study history. I have to read all day about social class stratification and all of this crap about how the middle class flees when the poor start moving into their neighborhoods. Many will argue that there is a racial component in the mix. In many instances I will agree. I guess that my point is that you can read, study, sympathize, even try to understand why things are the way that they are and come to some "enlightened" conclusion about the state of our society. For me, I was almost there. I sit with my nose in a book listening to an academic turn "stealing" into "removing items" from someone's home as a way for a marginalized member of society to assert their place in white middle-class society. Yeah, I was almost there until our house was burglarized and things that we worked hard for, things which we used to try to better ourselves were stolen. I wonder how many people that write some of this crap live in the type neighborhoods that they discuss in their research.

Now I will make lemonade: We get new computers. The moron who robbed us took one computer that was 2 years old and another that was over 4 years old; they left the power chords to both computers; they stole from someone who doesn't easily forget, believes in retribution, and believes that contrary to mainstream moral consensus, not all human life is sacred. In fact, many people who are alive today should probably be sterilized because of the damage they can potentially do to humanity by their procreation.

With that being said, and although I am still fairly angry about the situation, I am grateful that nothing worse happened. Whoever broke into our house was decent enough to not hurt our dog. Hopefully no one that I know will have to experience this sort of thing. I am still seething at the thought of some cockroach imposing his vile existence in our home. However, as a very wise woman whom I know says: Revenge is a dish best served cold, with a long wooden spoon. I'm out.

Monday, April 30, 2007

Hypocrites In High Places

Man, it must be nice to have friends in high places to help you skirt the law. I wonder if someone who didn't work for a United States Senator or didn't have a Governor for a father could do things like this and get off without so much as a slap on the wrist?

I think it is clear these incidents were honest mistakes but there have been many documented cases where other people who were less connected made similar mistakes with very different outcomes. Politicians think they are better than us and they shouldn't have to follow the same rules. What happened to the mainstream media on these stories? There seems to be a noticeable lack of coverage. The Senator Webb aide story was covered but the dismissal of charges seems to be completely unnoticed. The only ones indeed. Damn.